I'm inconsistent, I know

I am the type of person to get super excited for something for a solid minute and drop it entirely the next. I will make this whole intricate plan in my head and think a million steps ahead and a week later, I will lose sight of that plan. I'm inconsistent and I guess I have to accept some hard truths.

A little while ago, I had this grandiose plan of taking my blog to the next level and turning it into a paid platform. The moment that plan started gaining some traction because I was well on my way to creating content around it, preparing for the launch, etc., it all became a chore, more so like a job than something I did for my own enjoyment. That's always been my hard limit with writing. I told myself after the book that if I ever feel like writing is becoming tedious again, I will take a break and allow it to flow into my life naturally again. Writing is my outlet to creativity and self-expression and if I can't write, a big mumbo jumbo of thoughts occupies way too much space in my brain and it quite frankly can be crippling.

And so, despite the public demand for the content, whether paid or unpaid, I felt it was necessary to give myself the reset I needed. So I stepped away for a bit.

I don't like it when the joy gets taken out of the activities I enjoy doing. I already work hard enough at my actual job, I don't want something that I consider a passion to also turn into a job. So i guess that if we want to call that inconsistence, so be it. I'd rather protect this small little joyful passion of mine to share when I am ready, on my own terms.

If I can provide some words to you all, I'd like for you to stay aware of the things that bring you joy and make sure not to overdo it. Everything has a limit, even when you enjoy it. It's like absolutely loving cheesecake and choosing to have it for every meal - probably not the best idea. If you need to take a break to let yourself be reminded as to why you liked that thing (or cheesecake) in the first place, then do it. At the end of the day, you are responsible for your own happiness in whatever form that may take.

I'll talk to you guys soon hopefully. I think about writing more and more these days.